Sweet Dreams
by hochrami
Summary: Short story - Shepard dreams of home [ EDIT 2014/05/26 - Work has undergone some editing. Fixed typos, minor changes to flow, no major additions. ]


"_The woods are lonely, dark and deep. But I have promises to keep…"_

Alone in his cabin, illuminated only by the faint, blue glow of the fish tanks mounted in the bulkhead, Shepard sat in a chair next to his bed, holding a glass of scotch in one hand and the picture from his desk in the other. The Normandy had been on patrol for 60 days. Every one of them felt longer than the last.

When he first joined the Alliance, long deployments didn't bother him. He had no home outside of this ship, no family outside his crew, and no desire to change that. Then came Nihlus, and Eden Prime, and Saren and the Geth, and Cerberus, and the Collectors, and the Reapers, and all the events that had altered the course of galactic history. Life held a different meaning for him now. If he was honest, he knew he was living on borrowed time, and it seemed horribly ungrateful of him to waste any of it. These patrols were necessary, he understood that, but they felt like a waste.

Glancing down at the picture in his hand, he allowed emotion to wash over him. He thought back to the raid on Mindoir and the feeling of hopelessness that had engulfed him as his mother died in his arms. He thought of the purpose he'd felt in needing to find his sister, though she died in the attack as well. He thought of the kind man that first introduced himself as Lieutenant Anderson when the Alliance finally arrived. He reminisced over extranet messages and the occasional phone call, about how that one man had stayed with him for so long, giving him some sense of a family, even if there was never anyone to go home to at the end of each cruise. In truth, he preferred it that way. No family meant never experiencing that pain again.

He lifted the tumbler to his lips, allowing the burning brown liquid to wash slowly over his tongue, wishing he could numb away the turmoil raging behind his eyes. He wanted more with her, he wanted a lifetime of love and the giggling sounds of little blue children running around the house, playing and arguing and laughing and whining. The thought both warmed his heart and chilled his soul. Family meant pain, and he was too afraid of what losing them could mean. Still, Liara had always been a talented biotic, and she'd well learned to defend herself over the course of the war. To see her when emotion won out over logic an analysis, as had happened on more than one occasion when battles were going bad, you'd have thought she was a matriarch for all the biotic power she could produce. He knew there was little that would ever be able to hurt her, and between the two of them, even less that would hurt their girls, but his own emotions were winning out over logic an analysis and fear gripped him. Liara could set him right, help him overcome the fear, but he was 60 days into a cruise and she was back home, on Thessia, managing reconstruction projects.

"EDI. What's the local time on Thessia?"

"0100 hours, Shepard. Would you like me to attempt communications with Dr. T'Soni?"

"No. Thank you, EDI."

He knew she was spending her days in a maelstrom of activity, and didn't want to disturb her sleep. He knew she'd have welcomed the call, but he'd feel selfish for waking her. He opened his omni tool and typed out a quick message for her to read in the morning.

"I love you. I miss you. I need you. 60 days is 60 too many. Can't wait to come home to you. Going to try for some sleep. Talk to you soon."

With that, he drained his glass and lay on his bed, hopeful that tonight would be one free of the nightmares he only seemed to have when she wasn't with him, and drifted off to sleep.

_Looking out the skycar window, he could see the T'Soni estate looming on the seaside hill in the distance. Anticipation welled in his chest. Soon he'd be able to hold her. Kiss her. Taste her on his lips. Feel her warmth against him. Hold her while they slept. Heaven waited on that hilltop. _

_Minutes later, the skycar landed and he stepped out, unannounced, knowing he'd be alone for a few hours. He first carried the small grocery bags to the kitchen, depositing his even plans in the chiller and then unloaded his bags, carrying them through the house and into the bedroom, where he unpacked his things into the beautiful walnut and teak armoire that stood between the windows on his side of the bed. He quickly changed into a pair of shorts, and walked out onto the terrace to enjoy the smell of the sea and the warm breeze that blew up and over the hill, rustling the leaves in the trees as it passed. He looked around and could see the progress being made. Thessia was still well scarred by the Reaper invasion, but construction was coming along nicely. For all their patience, the Asari people weren't taking their time._

_He glanced at his wrist, his omni tool having self-adjusted for Thessian time, and calculated the minutes until she'd be home. Satisfied that he had some time to unwind, he walked down to the beach, stripped out of his clothes, and waded into the waves that crashed over the sand. The chill and persistent rush of the water over his naked body washed away the cares of his mind. He felt at home here; more so than he ever did on Earth. His only memories of Earth were his incarceration after his association with Cerberus and the initial Reaper invasion. His only memories of home were of a long ago destroyed colony that harbored only the ghosts of his dead. _

_He emerged from the water, picked up his clothes, and headed back for the house, reminding himself that the only person on this planet that cared about nudity was him, and if they didn't mind, he wouldn't either. He walked through the high arching front door and stopped to look at the beautiful home Liara had inherited as the head of the T'Soni lineage. The floors were white marble with copper colored ribbons threaded through them, the stairs a deep mahogany color. Paintings of Liara's ancestors hung on the walls, and local foliage in greens, blues, purples, and reds filled the room with an aroma that instilled a sense of welcome on any who visited. He recognized Moonlight Lily, Halspree, and Viseka's Gift growing in the planters. A beautiful chandelier hung from the high vaulted ceiling, the crystals of which it was built capturing the natural light and radiating it around the room so that one would think they were standing outdoors. _

_Checking the time again, he headed to the refresher to wash the salt of the sea off his body and get ready for Liara to come home._

_He dressed in loose fitting clothing, fashionable but relaxed, and prepared for an evening at home. He moved next to the kitchen, removing the fish he'd purchased for dinner, all of her favorites, and set about preparing their first meal together in several months. Liara had come to adore sushi, and Shepard had taken a few lessons on preparing it as a surprise for her. He set to work slicing the fish and preparing the rice, cutting ribbons of seaweed and julienning some local vegetables that would go well with the dish. He prepared a salad and chilled a bottle of Thessian Red._

_He was lighting the candles on the dining room table when he heard her car land, and moved into doorway leading to the foyer. He watched as she made her way through the door, looking tired from a long day, her eyes on the ground as she kneaded her right shoulder with her hand. She let slip a small groan, looked up and locked eyes with him for a moment before screaming and running across the room to throw herself into his arms. There they embraced, murmuring their "I've missed you"'s to each other before breaking for a deep kiss, driven by the distance they'd felt since his departure. _

_He broke away from the kiss, still holding her in his arms, gazed lovingly into her eyes and said, "Welcome home."_

"_Goddess, Shepard! When did you get here?"_

"_A few hours ago."_

"_You Nothos, why didn't you tell me you were coming?"_

"_I wanted to surprise you. Come here."_

_Hand in hand, they walked into the dining room, where he'd set 2 places at one end of the table. He pulled out her chair, held her hand as she sat, and poured her a glass of wine. The grunt of thanks that came as she reached out for the glass told him everything her entrance hadn't about the stress she'd been under, and he bent down to kiss her crest before disappearing into the kitchen. He returned with salads, and went back for the sushi. When the meal was set out and he took his seat, he looked over to see a bemused and somewhat shocked face staring back at him._

"_When did you learn to make sushi?"_

"_You'd be amazed what you can accomplish with a few extranet videos and the willingness to abuse your spectre status to get fresh fish delivered to your ship."_

_She laughed, and tentatively tried the sushi._

"_Mmmm."_

"_I'll take that as a compliment."_

"_Shepard, this is delicious. And it's my favorite fish. This is wonderful."_

"_I'm glad. I wanted tonight to be perfect."_

"_Well, it's off to a good start, but you're going to have to work pretty hard to keep me this impressed."_

_He laughed with her over dinner, basking in her closeness, swimming in her scent, knowing he never wanted to leave her again and utter the words that had become their tradition; "I promise, I'll come back to you."_

_With dinner eaten and the bottle of wine empty, she left him long enough to shower and change, and then met him the sitting room where he waited with another bottle of wine and 2 full glasses. They sat on the terrace, enjoying the evening air, catching up on events, enjoying each other's company. When the bottle was empty and a chill appeared on the air, he led her into the sitting room, to the plush sofa, and laid back against the arm, one leg trailing along the back, the other flat footed on the floor. He pulled her down to him, and she laid her cheek against his chest, wrapped her arms around him and hugged him close to her. He, in turn, enfolded her in his arms and held her to him as a deep sigh escaped his lips._

"_I want this every day. I never want to leave you again."_

"_That'd be lovely, Shepard, but how are you going to arrange that?"_

"_Retirement. I'll leave the Alliance, leave the Spectres, and stay here with you. Just like we talked about, marriage, lots of little blue children."_

"_Mmmm… that sounds perfect."_

"Commander Shepard, you have an urgent call from Admiral Hackett. Shall I connect it to your terminal?"

His eyes opened slowly, and he groaned before answering, "Yeah, EDI. That'll be fine."

"I have informed the Admiral that I woke you for the call and have asked that he give you a moment to prepare."

"Thank you, EDI. You're the best."

"I am aware I am vastly superior to all organics, Shepard, you do not need to remind me."

"It's a little early for jokes, EDI."

"Who said it was a joke?"

…

"Very well, it was a joke."

He looked at the clock and realized both that he'd slept for 6 hours, more than he was used to, and that he hadn't been jolted awake by a nightmare. He checked his omni tool to find a message from Liara.

"It has been too long. I miss you so much. Come home soon. Let's have sushi when you get back."

He sat down at his terminal to find Admiral Hackett staring back at him.

"Good moring, Commander."

"Good morning, sir. EDI said you had an urgent message for me?"

"Yes, Commander. I had a meeting with Alliance High Command yesterday and we've decided to reroute your team."

"Yes sir, right away. Where are you sending us?"

"You're to make for the Athena Nebula, the Parnitha system. The crew of the Normandy is being tasked with assisting with the rebuilding efforts on Thessia. Congratulations, Commander. You're going home. Tell Dr. T'Soni I sent my regards."

"… _and miles to go before I sleep."_


End file.
